Genesis 37:34-35: Inconsolable.
“34 Then Jacob tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and mourned for his son many days. 35 All his sons and daughters came to comfort him, but he refused to be comforted. ‘No,’ he said, ‘I will continue to mourn until I join my son in the grave.’ So his father wept for him.” NIV
You may have heard the joke that goes, ‘How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?’ Answer: ‘Only one; but the light bulb has really got to want to change!’ Within the silly humour a great truth lies embedded: people will not change unless they are willing to change.
I’m not criticising Jacob. We feel for him in his grief. It’s understandable. But sooner or later (and no-one can state categorically how long it will take-it may be weeks, it may be years) everyone who has lost must move on. You have to adjust and accept that there will now be a ‘new normal’.Jacob, at this stage, was unwilling to do so. He was stuck.
Of course, this principle doesn’t only apply to the loss of a loved one. There may be changes in our lives we know we need to make, and we may actually say we want to change. Now no-one can change without God’s power operating in them; but even with all the grace of God available to believers, some never change because they love their sin too much.