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^“32 Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben, for she said, ‘It is because the Lord has seen my misery. Surely my husband will love me now.’” NIV

‘’It is because the LORD has seem my misery. Surely my husband will love me now.’’

Thinking and writing about Leah yesterday, and her understandable sadness about coming second in her husband’s affections (and possibly a very poor second at that), coincided with something I read in a book by Henri Nouwen:

‘…very few people know that they are loved without any conditions or limits. This unconditional and unlimited love is what the evangelist John calls God’s first love. ‘’Let us love,’’ he says, ‘’because God loved us first’’ (1 John 4:19). The love that often leaves us doubtful, frustrated, angry, and resentful is the second love, that is to say, the affirmation, affection, sympathy, encouragement, and support that we receive from our parents, teachers, spouses and friends. We all know how limited, broken, and very fragile that love is. Behind the many expressions of this second love there is always the chance of rejection, withdrawal, punishment, blackmail, violence, and even hatred. Many contemporary movies and plays portray the ambiguities and ambivalences of human relationships, and there are no friendships, marriages, or communities in which the strains and stresses of second love are not keenly felt. Often it seems that beneath the pleasantries of daily life there are many gaping wounds that carry such names as: abandonment, betrayal, rejection, rupture, and loss. These are all the shadow side of the second love and reveal the darkness that never completely leaves the human heart.’ (‘In the Name of Jesus: Reflections on Christian Leadership’, pp.25,26)

In this book Nouwen argues that the Christian leader of the future must be anchored in the knowledge of God’s first love. Their identity must be deeply rooted in God’s first love,

This, of course, applies to every Christian. Like Jesus Himself, we must be sure of who we are as beloved children of God (Luke 3:22). Yes, we may be tempted at times to doubt this (see Luke 4:3/9: ‘’If you are the Son of God…’’). But what we all need, leaders and led alike, is to be so aware that we are loved by God that our essential security in Him is unshaken, no matter what anyone else may say or do. This will not mean that we vwill go unscarred by the bad behaviour of others, but we need not be defined by it. When we know we are deeply and unconditionally loved by God, we don’t need anyone else’s approval.

But we must learn to root our lives deeply in His love.

PRAYER: Thank you Lord that my worth is not dependent upon the value-judgments of others. I am of great value because of who I am in your eyes. O Lord, I admit it’s often a struggle to see and feel this. So please help me in my weakness and need.

^“31 When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he enabled her to conceive, but Rachel remained childless. ³² Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben, for she said, ‘It is because the Lord has seen my misery. Surely my husband will love me now.’³³ She conceived again, and when she gave birth to a son she said, ‘Because the Lord heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too.’ So she named him Simeon.³⁴ Again she conceived, and when she gave birth to a son she said, ‘Now at last my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.’ So he was named Levi.³⁵ She conceived again, and when she gave birth to a son she said, ‘This time I will praise the Lord.’ So she named him Judah. Then she stopped having children.”NIV

We may not always understand the negative experiences we have to go through, but we can be certain that the Lord sees (and hears, v33) what is happening. He sees ‘’my misery’’ (32), and he sees me in it. I venture to suggest that we often find there are divine ‘compensations’ amidst life’s troubles. Sometimes surprisingly so.

But Leah had to learn (and so do we) that she could never earn Jacob’s love. Love is freely given. It can’t ever be a salary

That said, what the passage shows movingly is that although Leah felt the deficit where Jacob’s love was concerned, she was the recipient of God’s tender loving care in tangible and sensible ways – ways she could comprehend, could make sense of.

None of this actually changed the sad situation with Jacob. But even amidst pain and disappointment, may we learn to ‘’praise the LORD’’ (32). Indeed, may it be our determined choice to do so: ‘’…I will praise the LORD.’’

 ‘The names of Leah’s sons suggest the blessings that accrue through heartbreak. For the Leah’s of the world there are great compensations. God remembers and hears them. Broken-hearted and forsaken, they live again in the lives of those whom they have borne either naturally or spiritually.’ F.B.Meyer: ‘Devotional Commentary’, p.26.

‘Each wife had what the other wanted. Rachel had love but wanted children (Genesis 30:1). Leah had children but wanted love. Indeed, Leah expressed her longing for Jacob’s love in the names she gave her first three sons: Reuben, which sounds in Hebrew like ‘’he has seen my misery’’; Simeon which means “one who hears”; and Levi, which means “attached” – an intimation of Leah’s hope that Jacob would become more “attached’ to her after the birth of her third son. Levi became the ancestor of the Levites, the priestly line of Israel.

After the birth of her fourth son, Leah seems to have become more content and thankful, for she named him Judah, which means “praise.” Judah became the ancestor of the royal line of Judah, from which would come King David and eventually the Messiah, Jesus Christ (Matthew 1:3)’ Tom Hale: ‘Applied Old Testament Commentary’,p.175

Considering this short passage reminded me of these beautiful song lyrics:

‘The love of God is greater far

Than tongue or pen can ever tell

It goes beyond the highest star

And reaches to the lowest hell…’

I once heard the profoundly touching story that the words of the second stanza, were found written on the wall of a mental asylum somewhere behind the iron curtain:

‘Could we with ink the ocean fill

And were the skies of parchment made

We’re every stalk on earth a quill

And every man a scribe by trade

To write the love of God above

Would drain the ocean dry

Nor could the scroll contain the whole

Though stretched from sky to sky.’

PRAYER: I thank you Lord that nothing can separate your people from your love

“After Jacob had stayed with him for a whole month, ¹⁵ Laban said to him, ‘Just because you are a relative of mine, should you work for me for nothing? Tell me what your wages should be.’¹⁶ Now Laban had two daughters; the name of the elder one was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel. ¹⁷ Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel had a lovely figure and was beautiful. ¹⁸ Jacob was in love with Rachel and said, ‘I’ll work for you seven years in return for your younger daughter Rachel.’¹⁹ Laban said, ‘It’s better that I give her to you than to some other man. Stay here with me.’ ²⁰ So Jacob served seven years to get Rachel, but they seemed like only a few days to him because of his love for her.²¹ Then Jacob said to Laban, ‘Give me my wife. My time is completed, and I want to make love to her.’²² So Laban brought together all the people of the place and gave a feast. ²³ But when evening came, he took his daughter Leah and brought her to Jacob, and Jacob made love to her. ²⁴ And Laban gave his servant Zilpah to his daughter as her attendant.²⁵ When morning came, there was Leah! So Jacob said to Laban, ‘What is this you have done to me? I served you for Rachel, didn’t I? Why have you deceived me?’²⁶ Laban replied, ‘It is not our custom here to give the younger daughter in marriage before the elder one. ²⁷ Finish this daughter’s bridal week; then we will give you the younger one also, in return for another seven years of work.’²⁸ And Jacob did so. He finished the week with Leah, and then Laban gave him his daughter Rachel to be his wife. ²⁹ Laban gave his servant Bilhah to his daughter Rachel as her attendant. ³⁰ Jacob made love to Rachel also, and his love for Rachel was greater than his love for Leah. And he worked for Laban another seven years.” NIV

You have to say this is one of the great lines in Genesis. So full of ironic humour. It must have been quite a party too for Jacob not to know he’d been duped until the morning. Maybe the combination of the darkness, wine and Leah’s veil made Laban’s deception all the more effective. Someone suggested that when Jacob said, ‘’Give me my wife’’ (22), he should have been more specific!

Jacob more than met his match in his slippery, wily Uncle Laban. If this was indeed the custom (26,27) why did he not mention it earlier? Jacob’s question to his uncle in (25): ‘’Why have you deceived me?’’ should be cross-referenced with Genesis 27:35,36. The deceiver was himself deceived. He had a most unpleasant taste of his own medicine, reaping something of what he had sown.

But, they say ‘love conquers all’, and Jacob’s deep love for Rachel motivated him to work long and hard to have her (20,30).

By the way, although we do find examples of polygamy in the Bible, and it does seem to have been permitted, it is never commanded. It is not the divine order of things. More than once we can see for ourselves that it’s not a good idea. In the words: ‘’Jacob…loved Rachel more than Leah’’ (30) there are ominous rumblings. But even in bad things, God overrules.

‘Looking back, we can see God’s hand in ordering these events. Jacob got his just deserts for cheating Esau. God got six future tribes of Israel from Leah, and two more from, her maidservant Zilpah (verse 24). Once more, God used the schemings of sinful humans to further His larger purposes.’ Tom Hale: ‘Applied Old Testament Commentary’, p.174.

PRAYER: Lord, I pray you will keep my heart, my words and all my actions true and honest. Help me to reject every form of falsehood. I would be committed to truth.

“Then Jacob continued on his journey and came to the land of the eastern peoples. ² There he saw a well in the open country, with three flocks of sheep lying near it because the flocks were watered from that well. The stone over the mouth of the well was large. ³ When all the flocks were gathered there, the shepherds would roll the stone away from the well’s mouth and water the sheep. Then they would return the stone to its place over the mouth of the well.⁴ Jacob asked the shepherds, ‘My brothers, where are you from?’‘We’re from Harran,’ they replied.⁵ He said to them, ‘Do you know Laban, Nahor’s grandson?’‘Yes, we know him,’ they answered.⁶ Then Jacob asked them, ‘Is he well?’‘Yes, he is,’ they said, ‘and here comes his daughter Rachel with the sheep.’⁷ ‘Look,’ he said, ‘the sun is still high; it is not time for the flocks to be gathered. Water the sheep and take them back to pasture.’⁸ ‘We can’t,’ they replied, ‘until all the flocks are gathered and the stone has been rolled away from the mouth of the well. Then we will water the sheep.’⁹ While he was still talking with them, Rachel came with her father’s sheep, for she was a shepherd. ¹⁰ When Jacob saw Rachel daughter of his uncle Laban, and Laban’s sheep, he went over and rolled the stone away from the mouth of the well and watered his uncle’s sheep. ¹¹ Then Jacob kissed Rachel and began to weep aloud. ¹² He had told Rachel that he was a relative of her father and a son of Rebekah. So she ran and told her father.¹³ As soon as Laban heard the news about Jacob, his sister’s son, he hurried to meet him. He embraced him and kissed him and brought him to his home, and there Jacob told him all these things. ¹⁴ Then Laban said to him, ‘You are my own flesh and blood.’ After Jacob had stayed with him for a whole month,”NIV

First of all…some random thoughts/musings from years of reading this passage:

• My experience of church life seems to say to me that people will gather where there is refreshment (2);
• Love changes everything. It causes people to do heroic things. It can fill the heart with an unexpected vitality and strength. Consider Jacob single-handedly moving this stone. It was probably quite a feat for one man. (I wonder, was there something of a testosterone-filled bravado going on???);
• The stone has been rolled away, as someone said, ‘not to let Jesus out, but to the let the church in’ to the truth and experience of resurrection life. How we are ‘’watered’’ at the well of Christ’s empty tomb (10)! Whenever I read these verses, I can’t get away from a sense of resonance with the first Easter stories. There are surely faint echoes of it here, even centuries before the actual events?

But here’s what I really want to focus on. It’s a point made by Warren Wiersbe in ‘With the Word’, p. 36: ‘God’s providence brought Jacob to the well just as Rachel was arriving. (See Gen.24:27).’

Again and again in the Christian life we are made aware of these ‘God-incidences’. Sometimes they may lie in the realm of our own experience. Other times we read about them, or hear about them happening to others. But they do occur uncannily often. I feel it’s part of the romance and adventure of the Christian life. It’s too much for co-incidence.

Wiersbe also points out a couple of other matters worthy of our attention:

• Abraham’s servant found a wife for Isaac, but Jacob had to find his own. God works with us personally and individually. We are not mass-produced. His plans for people differ;
• It seems that, typical of Jacob’s scheming nature, he tried to get rid of the shepherds so he could have Rachel all to himself!

‘The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and we have a special claim on his guidance in our matrimonial alliances – the most solemn and momentous step of all.’ F.B.Meyer: ‘Devotional Commentary’, p.25.

^“10 Jacob left Beersheba and set out for Harran. ¹¹ When he reached a certain place, he stopped for the night because the sun had set. Taking one of the stones there, he put it under his head and lay down to sleep. ¹² He had a dream in which he saw a stairway resting on the earth, with its top reaching to heaven, and the angels of God were ascending and descending on it. ¹³ There above it stood the Lord, and he said: ‘I am the Lord, the God of your father Abraham and the God of Isaac. I will give you and your descendants the land on which you are lying. ¹⁴ Your descendants will be like the dust of the earth, and you will spread out to the west and to the east, to the north and to the south. All peoples on earth will be blessed through you and your offspring. ¹⁵ I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.’¹⁶ When Jacob awoke from his sleep, he thought, ‘Surely the Lord is in this place, and I was not aware of it.’ ¹⁷ He was afraid and said, ‘How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God; this is the gate of heaven.’¹⁸ Early the next morning Jacob took the stone he had placed under his head and set it up as a pillar and poured oil on top of it. ¹⁹ He called that place Bethel, though the city used to be called Luz.²⁰ Then Jacob made a vow, saying, ‘If God will be with me and will watch over me on this journey I am taking and will give me food to eat and clothes to wear ²¹ so that I return safely to my father’s household, then the Lord will be my God ²² and this stone that I have set up as a pillar will be God’s house, and of all that you give me I will give you a tenth.’

God did not come to Jacob on this lonely journey and reveal Himself to him because the man was deserving. He wasn’t. He was twisted and he was twister. He was on a long journey (not only physically). The process of transformation he would undergo would be lengthy and gruelling. But God, in His unfathomable love and mercy, chose this man. He met him this particular night in his sleep, and spoke to him, and reiterated promises made earlier about a land, a people and a blessing (see Genesis 12:3; 13:15,16). He made wonderful, kind promises, to be with him and bring him home. He showed him the true picture – that he was not alone. There were angels all around. But best of all, there was God. His presence is inescapable and unavoidable. But even by the end of this section, it appears Jacob was not fully believing (20-22), and we see evidence of the deal-maker, trying to bargain with God when he had no need to.

No, God did not meet Jacob because of what Jacob was like, but because of what God is like. He sovereignly comes to people, and chooses them, and works out His great purposes in them and through them. He works on them, changing them bit by bit, teaching them so much along the way.

I found in my Bible a reflection on this passage from F.B.Meyer – one I must have jotted down years ago:

‘…we ought to feel that the present moment of time and this bit of the world’s surface are linked with heaven. This is what the ladder meant for Jacob. The moor land where he lay, and Laban’s home whither he journeyed, were as near God as his father’s tent…Oh that by humility and purity we may become more sensitive and awake to the things that are unseen and eternal.’

In his ‘Devotional Commentary’ Meyer also writes: ‘Jacob may have thought that God was local; now he found him to be omnipresent. Every lonely spot was his house, filled with angels’ (p.25).

Many years later Jesus came to the earth, and spoke to Nathanael about being the fulfilment of Jacob’s dream (John 1:51). He is the ‘Ladder’ between heaven and earth, bringing God to men and men to God.

PRAYER: Lord, in your mercy and grace, please continue to work on this ‘Jacob’ heart of mine. It is still full of so much that ought not to be there. Thank you for your immense love and incomprehensible patience. May I live out all the plans you have for me, for the greater glory of your Name.